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some days it’s pretty hard to get things on paper. other days it’s insanely difficult. writing comes and goes in spurts, but sometimes you get so wrapped up in other things, you have to squeeze it out to get it started.
the last few weeks have been a blur. honestly i feel myself falling off the wagon of getting shit done, but i think for some reason if i blog maybe it’ll get me back into the thick of things.
i think the honeymoon phase somehow ended somewhere down the line, but if i could relate it to anything i think it would be a nice, smoooth-comedown, with my feelings settling on a nice, calm sensation. for the first few weeks i was so enamored with how perfect she was, the things she says and the moments she chooses to want my attention, just the small things where she knows the perfect thing to do to make me feel incredible.
but recently, i’ve seen just about everything, and i’ve realized that what we have is something way more beautiful than perfect. i think as a person i’ve always looked for the next thing, something closer to ideal, but what happened when i found it? there was always something else, somewhere, somehow, that would eclipse that. for a while i thought it was a cop-out when others and myself would say “i’ll know when i find her. it will just make sense.” but i’ve found something that i feel like i’ve known forever yet i’ll always find something to compound on this seemingly endless feeling of love. i’m so so happy.
sorry im not terribly eloquent at the time. thoughts have been nothing but scattered lately, but i just wanted to put something down.
